Self Respect

'We cannot become what we need to be by removing what we are.'
Abraham J. Heschel, from Believe in Yourself by Mansukh Patel

Self Acceptance
In order to be at peace with ourselves, we have to learn to accept ourselves.
You can be your own best friend or your own worst enemy depending on the decisions you are making on a moment-to-moment basis.
Decide now, today, to take control of yourself and your life and to give up the notion that you are an unwilling player in someone else's film. This is your life, your film and you are the director and the producer! You can play whichever role you like - so who is going to choose the part of victim, tormented by weakness and low self-image? Everyone wants to be the hero - so decide right now to accept that role and no other.

James and the oak tree
James gazed out of the window at the great oak tree that stood watching over the valley beyond. He loved that tree because it emanated strength and continuity in a world full of changes and uncertainty. It stood like a rock, reassuring and comforting.

He thought about his life and how so many circumstances had occurred to bring him to this point now. His job had been a good one and although very stressful it had made him feel important and 'somebody'.

He had always wanted to be somebody, but now he just felt useless. Losing his job was bad enough, but he never thought Jill would leave him when the going got tough. 'I worked so hard to feel good enough as a human being,' he thought 'but now I can see it was all just a cover up for what I really feel deep inside me.'

He wondered if the oak tree ever felt inadequate. 'No, it is content being a tree, never striving to prove anything to anyone,' he thought. And what great strength it had in just being itself. He got up and walked out across the valley, sitting himself down under the tree.

Looking up into the branches, he could feel how small he was in comparison and as the pain burned through his body, he sighed.

It felt so good to stop running from that feeling. Nothing to prove any more and no one to impress. 'Perhaps now I can accept myself and find my own greatness.'


Ask yourself...
Can I honestly say I am being a best friend to myself?
Are the decisions I am making supporting my highest good? Do they take me where I want to go?
Am I eating foods that strengthen or weaken my system?
Am I working in a job I love?
Am I having enough fun?
Do I feel I deserve to be everything I want to be?

The gesture of acceptance
With the right index finger touching the left thumb, take hold of the middle, ring and little fingers of the right hand with the four remaining fingers of the left hand.
Hold the hands with the fingers pointing upwards. Hold for at least sixty to ninety seconds.


The heart hug
Imagine you are holding a tree, your arms hugging the tree at shoulder height.
Visualise the strength and power of the tree flowing into you with each in breath and filling your whole body on the out breath.
Feel yourself become like the tree, strong and powerful.
Affirm: I am strong and powerful.



Become your own best friend

A best friend is someone you can depend on for the best advice and support at the times when you most need it. A best friend wants the best for you and does not want to see you suffer or struggle with your life. He or she will make sure you do things that bring you happiness, joy and fulfilment. They will help you to make choices about a career that you love and share in your adventures and pastimes. They will not let you fall into sadness or despair, but will always lift you up and make you laugh at your life. They will make sure you eat and drink the right things that make you strong, healthy, fit and happy. Being a best friend to yourself is a symptom of self-love. You love yourself enough to do the things that make you feel good about who you are and where you are going in life...